Going back to work this week after 3 weeks on reduced hours
for 2 weeks and then a full week off posed not only the usual challenges of
settling back into the routine and getting caught up with everything, it was
also very humbling, which I did not expect.
For the last three weeks, my focus has been primarily on spending
quality time with my family, and the days I had to work were spent making sure
the children I work with enjoyed summer camp to the max with one field trip
after another. The time flew by, and I
enjoyed my job more than usual, finding my passion again in spending time with
the kids, and I especially enjoyed my time off camping, laughing, and exploring
the beautiful NW outdoors with my family.
Then, I headed back to work and my 5:30 am opening schedule.
The first day was good, then by the second and third days, I noticed a change
in myself. I found myself annoyed with others for not doing things “the way I
would have done them.” I found myself blaming others for issues that I could
have helped resolve. I found myself
being unwilling to do the extra work for someone else because I was resentful of
what I believed they should be doing to help me. Wow! I am ashamed to even write that I can
think and behave this way. Where’s my grace for others? Where’s my
humility? I should be doing all I can to
give 110% to my work and my family, no matter how much anyone else decides to
give. I should be putting others above myself, not the other way around. I should be considering the fact that we all
have our strengths and weaknesses, and we should work together to complement
each other, supporting in weakness and encouraging in strength. That’s the only
way that teamwork can be successful. If I want to teach children that, then I
must be able to implement it in my own life.
It’s easy to get wrapped up in someone else’s negative mindset and a bit
harder to stay positive in the midst of negativity, but we must try.
After the week was over, I realized how easily I fell right
back into a judgmental, fault finding, negative perspective that I believe has
become a bad habit for me and maybe for Americans in general lately. It seems that’s ALL we do sometimes, seek out faults in
others, look at ourselves as superior to all others, and blame everyone else
when we fail. It’s all over the news and
particularly in politics these days. In fact, when there’s a story of kindness
or humility or putting others first, those stories are rapidly shared around
social media and touted as the ideal example of a human being, but these stories
are not as prevalent as the negative ones. So, here’s where my mind goes with
this one…Why should we HAVE TO SHARE the good stories as examples of how we all
need to behave instead of just behaving that way? These stories should not be
few and far between, but an integrated part of our everyday lives.
So, after this week at work, I hunger for more humility in
my life, and I grieve for the grace lacking in today’s world and in my own
life. I pray that God will show me how
to seek out and find the good in every person I work and play with each
day. I pray that my mindset will be
changed from judgment of others to judging myself first. I hope for a greater ability to provide grace
and turn the other cheek to those who need it from me the most.
Don’t be selfish; don’t try to
impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t
look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too. You
must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did
not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up
his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a
human being. When he appeared in human form, he
humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal’s death on a cross.
Therefore, God elevated him to the place of highest honor and
gave him the name above all other names, that at the name of Jesus every knee
should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth and
every tongue declare that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.
Philippians 2:3-11 (New Living
Translation)
