January 10: Writing Prompt #10-32 flavors

Vanilla, chocolate, or something else entirely?

    Jamoca almond fudge….need I say more? OK, I will…it has everything necessary in a super dessert: coffee (caffeine), nuts (healthy fat), and chocolate (which needs no further explanation-it’s chocolate).  It’s been my favorite since I was a child going to the Baskin Robbins 31 flavors on the corner of Airport and Whitesburg road in Huntsville, AL to now and whatever state, city, or country life takes me to.  I was never able to settle on a single flavor. 

     I caused my mom grief as a teenager (and many other times since), wore strange outfits in high school with multiple swatch watches on one wrist (don’t ask me why), and was always part of the in between crowd…not really popular, a nerd, an outcast, or any other one category. I was just me, even though I wasn’t sure exactly who that was until my mid-thirties.  I was insecure and quiet until you got to know me, and I wanted desperately to always make the right choices, but struggled with the temptations to check all the other choices out too…just like everyone else. J 

“I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.” Romans 7:15-20 (Paul speaking)

What’s your flavor?  And what does it say about you? 

January 9: Writing Prompt #9-1984

You’re locked in a room with your greatest fear. Describe what’s in the room.

     My grown children and I sit in the corner of a very dark room. We cannot see anything, not even ourselves, so we huddle together in silence.  The longer we sit, I feel an oppressive heat as if a hot, wet blanket is being draped over us.  It’s uncomfortable to say the least….I whisper encouraging words to the boys, but their minds drift farther and farther away from the conversation, and I start to feel their inner pain. From heartbreak to regret, anger, revenge, and jealousy to hate and bitterness, I feel it all, but it’s inside them.  I realize after a bit that there’s someone else in the room with us, someone who has my boys’ full attention, and I can’t pull them away from the trance they’ve been put into by the snake in the room…I’m losing them to his sly persuasions, deceptive temptations, and clever rationalizations.  It’s my greatest fear revealed, and I am helpless to stop it.  My children are miserable….and now they’ve moved away from me and the corner where we sat in solidarity, and I can’t find them; I can’t see them. I can’t get to them…I’m scared that I’ve lost them forever, and they will never know how precious they are because they have taken the wrong path and been overwhelmed with life’s pain and unable to lift themselves out of the pit they’ve found themselves stuck down inside.  All I can do now is pray and trust in God’s ultimate power over the situation and our lives…

“Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22: 6

“He also brought me up out of a horrible pit, Out of the miry clay, And set my feet upon a rock, And established my steps.” Psalm 40:2

January 8: Writing Prompt #8-Teacher’s Pet

Tell us about a teacher who had a real impact on your life, either for the better or the worse. How is your life different today because of him or her?

     There are two of my teachers who come to mind when I consider those who had an impact on my life for the better. These are my third grade teacher and a UMUC visiting college professor I took several classes from when finishing up my BA in English during my first years on Kwajalein.  Both of these teachers have something in common: they allowed their students to express themselves and recognized that each student is an individual and made sure we all had what we needed to succeed.  For my third grade teacher, this meant taking us out for extra recess time when we had too much pent up energy and encouraging my friend William to show off his Michael Jackson space-walking skills for the class.  I remember feeling very comfortable in my own skin that year, able to just be myself, which was not the norm for me in my younger days. 

     As far as my college professor, she was my creative writing, speech, literature and everything else communication and English teacher and as such, she gave us positive and constructive feedback on everything from journals to poetry and formal writing assignments and again, just made us, as a class, feel very comfortable with her and each other.  I’ve decided this is key, as a teacher myself, to allow students to see you as you are (be real) and make sure you take the time to see them for who they are as individuals and teach to both the individuals and the class as a whole. If you can do that, you’ll have a group of students who really want to perform for you and will learn simply because they are invested and engaged. 

     I couldn’t complete this entry on favorite teachers and their impact on my life without also noting some of the more current teachers in my life, my children’s teachers. My sons were very lucky to have some of the best teachers I have ever known during their time in the Kwajalein School System.  I am amazed by their dedication, professionalism, nurturing, and the positive environments they created for my boys formative years in elementary school.  I always felt welcomed into the classroom by each of them and the strong parent-teacher and teacher-student relationships they fostered gave me great comfort, knowing that they truly cared about my children’s academic, social, emotional, and overall well-being, so hats off to the George Seitz Elementary School staff!! My boys and I love and miss being a part of your wonderful school community. 

     These teachers impacted my life by sharing their love of writing and teaching with me, giving me the opportunity to fall in love with writing and the education profession, and finally by revealing the path to become an excellent teacher. Observing and working with my own and my sons’ teachers was the best on the job training I’ve ever received.  I’m so thankful for their wonderful examples as well as all the tips and tricks of the trade I “borrowed” from them for my past and current jobs in the educational and childcare fields. 

January 7: Writing Prompt #7-Helpless

Helplessness: that dull, sick feeling of not being the one at the reins. When did you last feel like that –- and what did you do about it?

     The last time I felt helpless was from February 14-March 26, 2014.  When we left Kwajalein for WA, I had a “tentative” job offer on base here, pending successful background clearances (which are required to work with children) and verification and completion of the vast amounts of paperwork that always seem to accompany government operations and employment.  J Between the day we arrived here (Valentine’s Day) and the end of March was over 6 weeks of “waiting” to know FOR SURE I would actually be employed in the small town we knew nothing about (and knew no one closer than a 3+ hour drive away) and had just relocated our entire lives to for my “tentative” job.  It got so bad at one point that I was actually looking for other jobs, and I was only about a day away from applying for one when I finally received confirmation that I would start work. 

     As far as what I did about this helpless situation, I made sure there was nothing else I could physically do (paperwork wise) to assist in the process (which meant lots of follow-up e-mails and phone calls to verify they had everything they needed from me), and I focused on helping my family settle into our new home.  Turns out, it took about 6 weeks to figure it all out, including purchasing a car, setting up the apartment with what we needed, receiving our shipment of goods from Kwajalein (which entailed unpacking it, then repacking what we did not need right away-about ½ of the boxes- and could not fit in our temporary apartment and then lugging it back down 3 flights of stairs into a moving truck to deliver to our storage unit nearby-WHEW!), and sorting out the delivery of my 17 year old stored items in AL to my parent’s house.  Not to mention, we also had the task of helping our youngest son get adjusted to a new school and life apart from everything he’s ever known. 

     So, I didn’t have much time to settle into the “helplessness,” and believe me, I can definitely throw a really good “pity party” when I feel out of control of my life and down in the dumps, but that’s one thing my experiences the last 7 years have taught me, how to LET GO! "Consider the ravens, for they neither sow nor reap; they have no storeroom nor barn, and yet God feeds them; how much more valuable you are than the birds! And which of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life's span? If then you cannot do even a very little thing, why do you worry about other matters?” Luke 12: 24-26 I am so thankful for this lesson from God.  Worrying does not give me any more control. All it does is stress me and everyone else around me out!! I felt confident this is where God was directing us to be, so I just had to continue to believe that He was going to work all the rest out, and He did.  I’m not going to say I didn’t have my moments of “freaking out,” but compared to how I would have responded a decade ago, I have made AMAZING progress…I mean, God has made amazing progress in me…As one of my favorite childhood church songs goes: “He’s still working on me to make me what I ought to be.” J 

January 6: Writing Prompt #6-My favorite

What’s the most time you’ve ever spent apart from your favorite person? Tell us about it.

    I had to think about this one for a bit because I have more than one favorite person in my life. I mean, how can you have just one favorite person when there are so many wonderful, diverse individuals in this world.  At any rate, I finally settled upon writing about one of my immediate family favorites, my 13 year old son, from whom I have spent more time apart the last couple of years than together, unfortunately.  L When my first-born decided he wanted to live in AL with his father at the “ripe old age” of 11, I understood his curiosity and his desire to please and be there for his father. After all, he was born on an island and had only visited the states for a month or so each year for the first 10+ years of his life. He was naturally interested in seeing what it was like to live in the states on a full-time basis, as well as play contact sports like football (only flag football is allowed on base at Kwajalein) and have all the opportunities American life affords tweens.

     So, in August of 2013, we said goodbye to my Sweet Pea (his nickname when he was little) in Alabama the Beautiful and jumped on a plane back to our tiny coral atoll. He visited in December for the holidays, but those first few months away were so tough. I was used to raising two island boys, and their friends were used to there being two Jones’ boys around to play, but now there was only one, and it was weird.  There was only one set of sports games to attend, only one child to check in when out and about on the weekends with friends, only one child to tuck in at night and remind to brush their teeth before bedtime.  Nothing else had changed for us…my son’s bed was still in its same spot, along with a lot of his stuff that he didn’t take with him when he left.  The school, teachers, and children attending were all the same; the island events and life in general continued on as usual, but it was without my baby boy.  At one point, we had some family friends over for dinner, and their older son had to leave and go back home after dinner because (as he shared with his mom later) it was too hard to be there without his close friend (my son). 

     It has gotten easier over time to be without him for 4-6 months at a time, but being in a whole new environment probably helps that too….there’s not so many memories here with him (since he’s only visited once during the summer so far), and I don’t have to see his friends every day and miss him when looking at or chatting with them.  Mostly, I just miss his shy smile, his “mommy, I love you,” his requests for prayers and songs at bedtime, and his amazingly courageous way of dealing with all of life’s challenges with ease. This is a kid who can stay calm as a cucumber (whatever that really means-how is a cucumber calm anyway?)  when he’s choking on a piece of flank steak at dinner or learning to scuba dive at age 11.  Nothing seems to rattle him…which scares me something…what’s he holding back inside?  Hopefully nothing, but either way, he’s my baby, and I miss him terribly every day we are away from each other, and I always will.