Today, I count my blessings, which started with the arrival of my fiancé from Roi. He couldn’t come down earlier in the weekend because he had to work on Sunday, and since it was a three day weekend, I asked him to at least come down for one night as we all missed him so much! I never tire of spending time with him, even though we mostly hung out with the kids all day and attempted to at least watch one movie without 15 million kid interruptions. :-) The second blessing is the blessing of the grill and my grill master extraordinaire. I headed to the store after he arrived and bought some burger making ingredients, corn on the cob, and fries. After a late lunch and making up the burgers, we were ready to rock the grill. It’s been one of the best housewarming gifts ever, a charcoal grill which is lit using a propane tank to get the charcoal going faster, but still provides that charcoal flavor. We use it almost every weekend, and the meals always turn out fantastic. Other blessings today are my home, my job, my safe warm island lifestyle, and last but certainly not least, my two sweet little boys, who are not so little anymore.
The newest experience I’ve had with my children since moving into a home they can stay in with me is the competition now with their friends and active lifestyle, which takes them away from me again. When I had no place where they could stay with me, I had to take them to Roi and rent rooms. No children live on Roi, and there’s not a lot of family oriented events going on there, so the time we had was 24/7, and quality time was key to making those weekends work. There times were very important to me because I didn’t get evenings with them or the benefit of providing them a home to relax in with mom after school and on weekends. Now, both of them are starting to spend more time out of the house on the weekends with friends and such than in, so I am trying more than ever to make the most of the time we do have all together. It’s harder to do here with all the other distractions for them, and I know it’s bound to happen some day (that they choose to spend more time with peers than mom), and because of this I am thankful for the time I had with them during my “gypsy” period. Those three years provided me with more quality time with my boys than I had in the first 3-5 years of their lives living at home with them when I was still married to their dad.
Thanks to my “gypsy period” and my then boyfriend, the people and island of Roi-Namur (our getaway place), and my BQ (Bachelor Quarters) where the boys could not go, I was not given the time or choice to allow life to pass me by or for them to “grow up before I knew it,” and I did all the things so many parents never get around to doing with their children because life gets so busy and you end up spending the weekends cleaning and taking care of business while the kids watch TV or play with friends at home. Those choices were taken away from me at that time, but I certainly don’t regret it, even though it was more than challenging. Because of the last 3 years, I’m more ready than some moms to allow my boys their independence now and at a fairly young age simply because I had them only part time for that particular time of their very young lives and whatever control I felt I needed over them I had to let go of. Because of those experiences, I also know how to slow down and spend that quality time with them as needed because I’ve had so much practice at figuring out what that time means and consists of for us.
That said, I will always be thankful for the blessings of making Kung Fu Panda Rice Krispie treats and salt water taffy, working through a book of kids’ science experiments in one weekend, including the well known vinegar volcano, camping out at the beach shack and having relay races in the pool, snorkeling in the Japanese pools and in the middle of the Pacific Ocean and fishing off the piers and in the “secret spot,” and going to the snack bar for my son’s favorite mozzarella sticks. This doesn’t even include the geocaching and treasure hunts, which are some of my fondest memories of our “gypsy days” on Roi. Thank you, fiancé, for all the work you put into making our weekends spectacular and thank you, Roi Rats, for making us always feel so welcome into your world. This lazy Monday, I count my blessings, which are more than I could ever deserve...
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