Think of a topic or issue about which you’ve
switched your opinion. Why the change?
Hmmm…I have
done a whole lot of changing, learning, and growing up over the years, but I
can’t honestly say that the basics of my upbringing, in terms of my beliefs and
opinions about most major issues or topics have ever taken a full 360 degree
switch. I think I have opened my mind
tons to the world and all its different types of people, cultures, and ways of
thinking, but my core has remained rooted to the same tree of thought I grew up
with.
When you’re
younger, you take what your parents, church, and teachers tell you and believe
it, for the most part. And for most, that becomes what you believe and who you
are. I was fortunate enough to grow up with two very opposite parents who have
many of the same core values about life and family, but who view people and the
world through very different colored glasses. That means I was able to see more
than one side of things through putting on each of their glasses and looking at
the world in varied colors. Early on, I
had the opportunity to take what others said or wanted to teach me with a grain
of salt, partially because my father questions everything himself. He never takes anything at face value,
analyzing each situation and person before coming to any conclusions. Even the
church I attended with my mom in my teenage years ensured their members were
taught to weigh teachings given against the actual Bible and your own intuition
or word from God. I was taught not to
just believe blindly in anything.
Because of
this background, most of my opinions about any topic or issue were developed
over time, analyzed, and weighed against what I had already found to be true
and in sync with my own soul. This means
there would have to be a major upheaval or change in my life or the world
around me to switch those opinions now. If I had grown up without this type of
cautious, analytical compass to guide my development, I might have switched my
opinion multiple times over the years as I learned new information to add to
what I had just blindly accepted as truth to start. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s
probably how many of us grow up and learn. It’s just not how growing up worked
for me.
My
upbringing had its own uniqueness, the same kind of life growing up is now for
my boys. I’ve always said that I hope
(even though you never want any family to have to experience the trauma of
divorce) the experience of having 2 such very opposite parents will give my
boys a leg up on life. They will already know that families and people are all
very much their own and handle life’s challenges in many, varied ways, and
hopefully this will help them as they face these situations and are able to
think critically about them before making decisions because they know more
about people and the world than most and earlier on.
When my
parents got divorced, I was very involved in the church I grew up in with my
dad, mom, and brothers. My belief in God
was already super strong, even at 12. I remember praying and finding this verse
to comfort me, “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the
good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.”
Romans 8:28. After that, the clouds lifted for me, and I was okay, knowing that
God would bring good out of the divorce for me. I remember thinking OR maybe
God put the thought in my head, “There’s always a silver lining.” Maybe my own
divorce will give the boys a stronger and more useful perspective on life,
teach them how to be critical in their thinking and have more empathy for
different kinds of people and so prove to be one of those “silver linings” for
them as my parent’s divorce was for me.
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