We've all had those vacations where you feel like you need to take a vacation after your vacation, right? I mean you go, go, go trying to fit in all the activities, sightseeing, and fun you can in your chosen vacation destination, then you get home, and you're exhausted. Lately, I feel like that about my life and my weekends. Things are so busy at work, and then so busy over the weekend, that I can't wait for a day or two that I can just sleep until I don't feel tired anymore. There's only been a few times in my life where I felt like I couldn't catch up on rest, and I think that makes me pretty lucky. I've had plenty of friends and family who never slept well a day in their life and always feel tired, but I don't have trouble sleeping when I'm tired. It's more about having the time to sleep. My type-A driven personality drives me to sleep deprivation at times because I can't leave things undone. I'll stay at work later without getting paid just to get something finished that I don't feel comfortable leaving until the next day, then I'll continue to think about my job after hours to the point of dreaming about it at night. I've gotten better about it over the years, letting the little things go until later, but that dedication to my job, which is also one of my passions in life, has gotten me to where I am in my career, and I'm proud of what I've accomplished so far because of that.
That said, this weekend, I've not thought about work once, but I've been so busy helping entertain the boys with swimming, camping, and general kid type fun, that I feel more tired than refreshed. It's been a fabulous weekend, and I wouldn't have chosen to spend it any other way. Although, I think I need a break from the weekend! Tomorrow, the boys will be back with their dad at his house, and I'll get a chance to rest in my own bed in my own tiny dorm style room, and the funny thing is, I'll miss those things that usually keep me from resting when I'm with them, the brotherly fighting, the constant reminders to keep your voices down and to use walking feet when inside. The "I'm hungry," and "I'm bored," and "Can I have a treat?" requests will be absent, but that means my boys are absent from me, and that's simply not acceptable. I chose to have kids and to take on that responsibility. I knew when I had kids it would mean that sleep would be minimal for the next 18+ years, and I was okay with that, so yes, I'll have my sleep tomorrow, but I will miss the kisses on the check, the good morning hugs, the "Every day has been so much fun" comments, the reading together by the campfire, and the sharing giggles over lunch at the chow hall more than my sleep. My children have enhanced my life in a way sleep has never been able to do for me, so I choose being with them anytime over rest that I can get tomorrow, next week, next month, or next year.
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