October 28, 2010-Lessons from a Moldy Jack-O-Lantern

     One of my co-workers came up to me today and asked, "What happened to your pumpkin?" The Jack-O-Lantern the boys and I made over the weekend was on the small end table by my phone right inside my office, and it had become very dark and fuzzy inside. Pumpkins mold and rot very, very quickly out here.  I had already cleaned it out once, but overnight, the mold had gone into overtime! I noticed it first thing in the morning and had planned to clean it out and try to make it last one or two more days, but by the afternoon, when my co-worker saw it, the mouth and nose had begun to cave in.  Poor Jack-O-Lantern, it was time for him to go bye-bye! Now what lesson, you are thinking, can you learn from a moldy Jack-O-Lantern? Well, that's part of that love of learning for me in that if I am not actively in school and learning, I'll find something to learn from because I just like learning so much. 
     The moldy Jack-O-Lantern lesson actually came without much effort. As I was thinking about what to write for my blog, I remembered the pumpkin I threw out this evening and realized that even though I didn't want to let it go just yet, I needed to. That's part of what writing this blog has been for me, a way to completely let go of those things I'm still hanging on to since my divorce, such as having control over every aspect of my children's lives, being there for every important or not so important event, recognizing that their dad is not always going to do things the way I would OR even be on the same page as me.  It feels really good to let go, just as it felt good to get rid of that moldy pumpkin.  I love my boys, and I know that I'm doing the best I can for them in every way possible, and as far as the rest, that's up to God to handle.  All I can do is pray and realize that some of the little things just aren't important enough to make a big deal out of, and that it's a waste of my time and energy to make a mountain out of a mole hill, just like it would have been a waste of my time and energy to try and fix that pumpkin's mold problem, so I could get one or two more days out of it.