You know, some days being a divorced single parent with 2 little boys on a tiny atoll in the middle of the ocean without a home to stay with them in for the weekend really sucks! There, I've said it, in very plain, not very elegant, English slang. It sucks! After a late to bed, early to rise sleep over party last night, my precious babies were totally exhausted today when I went over to their dad's house to pick them up. It's not that I didn't expect them to be a little worn out because I knew they would stay up late. What kids wouldn't stay up late at a sleep over party? It's just that we had the costume carnival to attend this afternoon and a 4-H event tomorrow. It's a big weekend, and it's my weekend with them. So, after pitching a few fits about not wanting to stay with me tonight (because as usual we have to stay at someone else's house since mine is not ready to move into yet), we finally got everyone dressed up into their costumes and ready to head to the youth center for some fun. This year, my little one decided to be a Lightning McQueen Pit Crew Member, and my oldest was the famous wrestler Ray Mysterio. I, on the other hand, at the last minute too, chose to be something every little girl wants to be at one time or another, a princess named Snow White!
The big event at the carnival today was the pumpkin walk because, unfortunately, not enough pumpkins were ordered this year for all the families to be able to have one, so there are very few real Jack-O-Lanterns around the island, and the pumpkin walk was one of the few ways to get one to carve. My son wanted one so bad, not for the carving part, but for the pumpkin seed roasting, and thank goodness on the next to the last pumpkin giveaway round, he won! He told me, "Mom, my wish came true! I wished, and I prayed, and God helped me get a pumpkin!" I'm so glad He did because it made what started out as a very rough weekend a sweetness that I was missing. And tonight, I get to look up pumpkin seed roasting recipes to make tomorrow even better!
Maybe it's the dressing up, but after a fairly tense birthday party the night before with their dad and step-mom (it's the first party for the boys we've all participated in together), and a really tense few moments with my son as he pitched his "I'm exhausted" fit before settling down to get dressed for the carnival, life felt a little less "crappy" to use another lovely slang word. Sometimes slang or what others might consider "bad words" are the only ones that come to mind and feel appropriate for the moment. When you're frustrated, when you're tired, when life has thrown you too many curve balls that have hit you right in the noggin, a loud, long scream of anguish or just a well timed curse at nothing in particular except the unfairness of it all makes you feel better. I don't know why. It just does. I guess it's just another way to get those pent up emotions out so you can move on. Fortunately, I also learned through my brief stint as Snow White today, that a well placed squeal of delight, dancing for pumpkins with the youth of the island, and a Tootsie pop or two can make you feel better as well, maybe even better than the slang and anguished screaming. :) So, hopefully, more times than not I can take Snow White's high road, leave the slang behind, and start practicing sharing a dance with a friend or a Tootsie pop with my son, which allows us all to benefit and find the sweetness in life instead of focusing on the sourness of situations that sometimes just suck.
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